Is Everything In Order? Planning for Ageing
We all talk about our last days and what we think we may want them to look like but are we ever really fully prepared? This shouldn’t be something we think about when we are sick and have other things on our minds. We need to put a plan together when we are of able mind and body so we can rest knowing our wishes will be fulfilled and our loved ones know what to do.
We all think we are invincible but the fact remains we sadly are not. I know for me personally this has always been a difficult conversation to approach with my loved ones but it is one that needs to take place so there is no second guessing when that time comes.
Some very important things to think about as you ponder what your final chapter in the book of life may look like:
- Where do you want to be living out your remaining years? At home? Or in a facility? If you want to remain in your home, who or what organization would you like to have coming in to look after your needs. The time to choose this is not when you are under pressure and have to make a quick decision. Also remember in many cases there are waiting lists for the best care. There are many home healthcare agencies out there. Do your research. If you have pets you’ll need to make sure you can take your beloved companions with you if you are thinking of a residence.
- What medical measures do you want put in place in the event you are in hospital and are not able to make that decision? Ie: do not resuscitate, organ donation, etc
- Who will be your advocate and spokesperson to make medical and financial decisions on your behalf? It may not necessarily be your spouse or children. Choose someone who is strong under pressure and who has the time and ability to be by your side.
- Prepare a one page list of your medical history, medications, and doctors contact information. Keep this in a safe place with your Will, insurance and other important documents. I can’t tell you how valuable this information was to me when I was the caregiver to a relative a few years ago.
- Remember when preparing a Will (and if you don’t have one I strongly encourage you to prepare one) to accommodate for any pets or asset distribution. You can’t assume a relative will take your pet into their home.
When you finally get these very important issues sorted out in your mind and on paper you will be amazed at how much of a relief this will be. You can then get on with living and making sure that your remaining years will be the best they can possibly be.
I’ll leave you with this poem I read years ago that really sums it up perfectly.
It is called “The Dash” and is about the dash between our birth and end dates when we finally leave this earth. If you wish to read it in its entirety you can find it at www.linda-ellis.com/the-dash-poem.
Here are a few verses:
That dash represents all the time
that they spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved them
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own,
the cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our dash.
So, think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left
that can still be rearranged.
So when your eulogy is being read with your life’s actions to rehash, would you be proud of the things they say about how you spent your dash?